by Barbara Small
1. Remember that your thoughts create your destiny. Recognize your own power to create your life.
2. Stop worrying. Often by worrying we feel like we are "doing" something about a problem when we aren't. When we worry we are in the past or in the future. By staying in the present we can actually problem-solve the situation as it actually exists.
3. Don't believe in defeat. Unexpected opportunities often come with what initially seem like negative outcomes or mistakes . Also, when you feel defeated, make a list of the factors that are supportive of you, rather than focusing on those that are against you.
4. Stop all those little negatives because they grow in to large ones. Use thought stopping and the steps toward changing your negative self-talk.
5. Name what is blocking your positive thoughts. What prevents you from thinking positive all the time?
6. Examine each of your core beliefs in terms of how it operates in your life. Make a commitment to yourself to eliminate the ones that cause you distress or problems.
7. Focus on the present. Your energy is drained by regretting the past and worrying about the future. Stay grounded in the here-and-now where it is easier to actually problem-solve the real situations.
8. When faced with a problem, focus on possible solutions and the resources that you do have. Brainstorm. What are the many options available, not just the black-and-white solutions or obvious ones?
9. Take self-responsibility. Stop blaming others for your unhappiness. Recognize the consequences of your choices.
10. Identify your personal definition of success. This helps you decide which path you want to take and to know when you have arrived at your goal. Your definition of success will be unique to you. No one else can define it for you.
11. Fill your life with positive supportive people. Allow their positive opinion of you in. Don't block them because their opinions do not fit your image of yourself. What is the worse thing that could happen if you thought positive thoughts about yourself? You might actually feel more energetic and motivated and have more fun!
12. Avoid draining your energy by focusing on the past and looking at mistakes that have already been made. Focus on the lesson learned and not on the mistake. What can you learn from the choice you made, whether it was a good choice or not?
13. Express your appreciation and positive feelings toward others. Say thank you when they complete simple daily tasks. Avoid draining your energy focusing on what they didn't or haven't done.
14. When feeling overwhelmed by change, make a list of what is staying the same and what is not changing. What do you already know? What can you keep doing the same as before?
15. Acknowledge out loud your positive traits and successes. Question why it is considered conceited or arrogant to talk about what you do well.
16. Keep a gratitude journal. Each night before bed list three things that you are grateful for that day. Some days it may simply be that you are grateful that the day is finally over
17. Work at being content with who you are rather than pleasing others by wearing your social mask. When you wear a mask and try to be everything to everyone it can be exhausting. There is no space left for you. Also, I find that in order to please everyone I would have to keep switching masks for each new person because everyone will want something different.
18. Ask yourself: "How do I manufacture my own unhappiness?"
19. Keep asking yourself what is really important. In five years how much will this really matter?
20. Brainstorm a list of what makes you happy. Direct your attention to what pleases you. How can you allow or create more of this in your life?
21. Practice random acts of kindness.
22. Suspend judgment of yourself and others. Practice self-acceptance and acceptance of others. What does judging yourself or someone else achieve? Acceptance does not mean never changing. However, you cannot change what you don't recognize or accept you are doing.
23. Affirm and reaffirm your assets. List ten achievements you have obtained over the last 5 years. It could be finding a new job, taking a course, learning a new skill or changing your attitude.
24. Trust your intuition. Your intuition is that "gut feeling" or that hunch. It is your inner self speaking to you.
25. Create a home environment that is pleasing and nurturing to you.
26. Work at a job that energizes you.
27. Slow down. Learn to respond, rather than react.
28. Our own attitude is often what we see reflected in others. People in our lives act as mirrors to allow us to see ourselves more clearly. If you are surrounded by negative people, take a look at yourself. How might these people be a reflection of your own attitude? Similarly, as you become more positive you will attract more positive people to you. Initially though, as you become more positive the negative people in your life may escalate their negatively in order to try to pull you back in. Remember it is not your job to change them. Focus your energy on being more positive and creating more positive energy in your own life.
Which 5 of these suggestions will you commit to focusing on over the next 6 months?