VALUES











Values are so important because they fundamentally shape our relationships, our behaviors, our choices, and who we are. So, without knowing what our values are, it is actually impossible to create the lives we want because there is no foundation to build them on. Many can't understand why they do not reach certain goals as they dream. Likewise, some reach goals yet still feel empty and unfilled. Why is that? I believe it is because they have made goals based on outer appearances, what others what from them or what they think they want or should want for themselves.The goals in essence do not match with what the heart desires.



So much emphasis is placed on making goals and reaching them, but not too much is said about values. I suggest that if one's values are not determined and in place, making goals and achieving them will prove worthless. Goals that are achieved without a core foundation will leave you feeling empty every time because the goals and achievements are not in alignment with whom you really are.

It stands to reason then that if you determine your values first to help clarify and confirm what it is that is truly important in life. Then question of values if often overlooked, too, it seems such a huge and impossible question to answer. The word "value" is so easily and loosely used, but when I ask a client, "So what are your values?" they come up tongue-tied almost every time. In fact they do no fully understand what a value is. Values and goals often get mixed up too. It is true! Where does one start?

COACHING QUESTION OF THE DAY
What do your values need to be for you to create the lifestyle of your choice?

Buddhism And Suffering


VideoJug: Buddhism And Suffering


* How can Buddhist values help us to deal with traumatic events?
* Do you believe Buddhism is the best spiritual path to follow?
* How do Buddhists view death?
* How do you meditate on death?
* How does understanding death help Buddhists during life?
* What small things can we do to help in our hectic lives?



Through his reinterpretation of Buddhist thinking, he has encouraged individuals to become more socially aware. A highly respected expert in the techniques of Buddhist meditation, Mettanando now teaches people around the world how the practice of meditation can help them in their daily lives.

Buddhism Meditation
http://www.girltimecoaching.net/Inspiration.html

A NEW EARTH


Are You Ready to Be Awakened?
For the first time ever, you can join Oprah and Eckhart Tolle, the best-selling author of The Power of Now, as they teach A New Earth in Oprah's worldwide classroom live Monday nights on Oprah.com.

By reserving your seat for this 10-week interactive webinar, you'll be able to:
  • Watch and participate in the live classroom webcasts
  • Ask Oprah and Eckhart Tolle questions before and during class
  • Connect with others who are seeking to become more aware of themselves—and the world around them
  • Download and save your thoughts in an exclusive workbook
  • Access the classroom video archives…and more!
How to Reserve Your Seat:
You’ll need to be a member of Oprah.com and Oprah’s Book Club.

If you're not already a member of Oprah.com, you'll need to join now. During the registration process, you'll have the opportunity to become a part of Oprah's Book Club. Once you've done that, your seat will be reserved for the 10-week webcast. Click on the "Join Oprah.com" button to get going!



The first class starts Monday night, March 3, at 9/8c.


LOG IN TO RESERVE YOUR SEAT

WATCH VIDEO

You can buy book right here on Oprah's Book Club- Amazon

10 RULES TO LIVE AND LOVE BY:

Ten Rules to Live and Love By

1. Seeing your partner through the lens of love rather than fear automatically elevates the relationship to a higher plane. When you can get quiet and note when you are projecting fear, you can make the adjustment to see through a different filter. So often we feel indignant or incensed, but upon closer inspection we will find that we are really afraid. Once we assume our partner's core goodness rather than focusing on their "guilt," they will be more free to show us their best, which accelerates the process of shifting our perspective from one of blame and anxiety to one of acceptance and peace

2. Being willing to forgive yourself and your partner, and to make amends when necessary is an ongoing process of cleanup. We all make mistakes; it's human. But when we hold fast to a grudge it eats away at our sense of peace and serenity. If you aren't willing to forgive, you might ask yourself what habit of ego you're attached to. Do you want to continue life with unresolved issues hanging over you?

When we take a stand and refuse to let go of something, we can always find evidence to justify it. Or we can try to make peace. Instead of blaming or making excuses, we can clean things up and move forward. This is not an excuse for staying in a dysfunctional situation, but an opportunity to see innocence. Once we do that, we gain—or give—freedom to move out of a "stuck" place.

3. Relaxing when times get tough; assuming that "this too shall pass" allows you to roll with the punches. If you know things will inevitably arise to challenge you, you can be more detached when they do. Problems become worse when we dig in our heels and try to force a solution. By relaxing into whatever struggle arises, we remain flexible and open to inspiration and insight.

Even if you have a hard time letting go, you can at least observe yourself taking things very seriously, which in itself helps to detach you from the experience of anxiety. Whatever is happening now won't be happening a year from now, so just keep breathing through the situation and see if you can take things a little less seriously.

4. Seeing in the dynamic of the relationship the reflection of what you need to learn helps bring you back to what is important. Sometimes we get lost in the chatter of day-to-day patterns and lose sight of the soul's mandate to bring us closer to realizing our Oneness. The best way to see where we need to work on things is to observe who we are and what we do within the context of a relationship. Any time you recognize your impulse to create distance rather than intimacy, you can make the adjustment and get back on track.

This relationship, as with all relationships, is part of a curriculum to evolve into our highest potential. We come to know ourselves by how we interact with our partner, and by so doing we come to know Spirit.

5. When you don't know how to handle a problem, pray and meditate, surrendering the decisions to Spirit

Praying and meditating aligns your limited energy with that which is all-powerful. Of course we don’t have all the answers, but by consigning our limitations to our Higher Power, our burden is lifted. We need to be accountable for our words and actions and be willing to work through where we are stuck. We need to stay present and forgive. Beyond that, our creative power is fueled by Spirit. By praying, we ask for help and guidance; by meditating we clear our minds so that the answer will become apparent. By moving aside, we create an opening for God to work miracles in ways we could never imagine.

6. Honoring your partner's path and allow them the space to find their own way sends a clear message of respect. People need to work things out in their own manner and in their own time. If you try to help where help is not requested, you are signaling your lack of belief in your partner. If you back off and assume someone is strong and intelligent, strength and intelligence are what they will likely find.

Although we are all on this path of realization and expansion together, each of us is unique in our lessons to be learned; the way you do something might be totally different than how someone else needs to process a situation. Rest assured that Spirit is at work in all of our lives, and give yourself a rest from overseeing your partner's personal business.

7. Keeping up your personal growth work means you will keep your mind sharp and your awareness keen. Read, study, and attend lectures; don't rest on the laurels of what you think you already know. The moment we think we have it all figured out is the moment things will come crashing down around us. Arrogance leaves no room for intimacy or growth, and is certainly not part of a spiritual curriculum. When you immerse yourself in learning, you will always have new skills and interests to apply to a relationship, and thus the relationship will always feel fresh and relevant

8. Following the path of your own creativity keeps you attuned to that which moves and inspires you. As you indulge your creative side, you become less dependent on your partner to feel whole. Creative energy is the force that breaks new ground. To sustain love, we need to continually fuel whatever inspires us on the deepest level. Also, creativity balances out the egoist and intellectual side of life; it teaches us to play and have fun. When we engage our passions, we radiate passionate energy and thus maintain the interest of our partner as well as having your own sense of fulfillment.

9. Staying present keeps us in the moment which is where life is. Life does not exist in future predictions or past grievances; all we have for sure is right here and right now. Every moment teaches us something, and if we are busily trying to change or control something we miss the grace intended for us.

By allowing the sacred mystery to unfold without trying to tamper with it, we can move through anything with much more ease and simplicity. As we cease resisting, any so-called negative situation or emotion will have the space to work out. And by the same token, when we are completely alert and aware in any given moment, we are open to the subtle miracles happening all around us. By staying present, we will see our partner for who they are; we will hear clearly their communication and respond to it astutely

10. Being grateful for what you have zeros in on what is working, which in turn magnetizes more of the same. Where you put your focus is where you direct your creative intention; so if you want abundance, be grateful for the vitality you have now. If you want a soulful relationship, be grateful for the soulful moments. Gratitude is like a seed you plant; it grows more as it is watered and nourished. Show your partner what you appreciate in them and let them know that they have a positive effect in your life. The acknowledgements of good will call forth more of the same.

SEATTLE



GOALS


DETERMINING GOALS

What is the real importance of goals anyway? Well, there are quite a few reasons, but to put it in a nutshell, goal setting really does help to plan and when you plan you can do something about it. Putting a plan into action is what helps to make your dreams come a reality. The process of goal-setting helps you to choose a direction in life. By knowing precisely what he or she wants to achieve, you will know where you have to concentrate your efforts.


Many clients come to me with goals in mind, but need more clarification, direction and a plan of action. Other clients, however, do not even know where to begin and the very idea of goals freezes them up. As a Coach, I want to help clients define their goals, so that they can work on a specific plan of action, keep focused and get the most out of their business, personal and spiritual lives.


It is when individuals become aware of their core desires, dreams and goals, that they gain a sense of hope and freedom.

“Did you know that only 3% of people write down their goals, and of that 3%, 80% reach their goals? That is something worth thinking about. Just thinking about our goals will not make them materialize.


Nevertheless, I feel goals are worth the paper they are written on if ones values are not determined first. Most of the reading I have done suggests that goals go hand-in-hand with success. I want to challenge that by saying that values, passion and desire are the essential ingredients to success.


I believe that he reason why so many people and clients still feel empty after they have achieved a goal is that the goals they strive for are made irrespective of values, passions and desires. When they reach their goals still feeling empty they think that there is something wrong or that they have failed in some way. So they go on to the next goal in search of success, accomplishment and fulfillment.

So it is my belief that before you get started with setting your goals, it is essential to clarify your values, passions and deep desires first.


Questions for Determining Goals

Imagine you are on your deathbed looking back at your life, what is one goal you regret not at least trying to achieve?


1. What achieved goal of yours would you like to be part of your legacy?

2. What do you really want?

3. How will you feel when you get there?

4. How would your life be different if you were living this goal right now?

5. What is important to you about achieving this goal?

6. What will it take for you to make this happen?

7. What is the risk involved if you do not do this?

8. What do you want MORE of in your life? (make a list)

9. What do you want LESS of in your life? (make a list)

10. What could we work on now that would make the biggest difference in your life?

11. Can you visualize yourself having arrived at your goal?

12. Are your expectations realistic?


On a scale 1- 10, with 1 being very weak and 10 being “I’d so anything to achieve this goal’, how strong is your desire?



TAKING ACTION

Life is always changing. That is one thing we can be sure of. Decisions about our lives, our family, out work, our spirituality, our relationships and our personal growth have to be made daily. By procrastinating and putting off these decisions we put off short-term urgencies which ultimately become long-term matters of concerns and goals become very distant longings. It would serve our best interests to take action before we get to that point.


Remember that to achieve goals, as already mentioned it is vital to determine ones values and desires first. If individuals do not align their goals with their values, the chances of you not achieving your goals are pretty high. Even if the goals are reached it leaves a sense of emptiness and continued despair. So as it has already been mentioned it is important to determine values first before setting goals.


When goals have been determined the coach (me) can then help you make your goals specific, measureable and attainable. There are many useful tools which can be used to help you reach your goals such as writing them down on paper, visualization, setting deadlines, quantifying the goal, breaking it down into smaller chunks , doing research, drawing it etc… but if you do not take action it is not possible to move forward.







www.girltimecoaching.net

MEDITATION


The Dalai Lama Meditation Technique
All his life, The Dalai Lama, has been surrounded by masters of meditation and has been initiated into many different techniques. It is therefore appropriate that we pay attention when he points out one method so valuable that he does it everyday...


MIND, BODY & SPIRIT

The Dalai Lama Meditation

BY THE MEDITATION SOCIETY OF AMERICA


The Dalai Lama has been acknowledged by Tibetan Buddhists to be a reincarnation of the God of Compassion and by the world in general to be a Nobel Peace Prize winner but few know him to be a practicing mediator. All his life, he has been surrounded by masters of meditation and has been initiated into many different techniques. It is therefore appropriate that we pay attention when he points out one method so valuable that he does it every day:

Remember when you were a kid and they often had cartoons where someone had a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other and they were whispering into an ear -- one encouraging doing "bad" and one doing "good". In a way, that’s the basis of the Dalai Lama Meditation technique.


Sit quietly, calmly with eyes closed, as relaxed yet aware as you can be. Visualize yourself on the left side of your mind’s eye as you would appear to yourself and others in a moment of impatience. Really see this inner vision. Watch your face, observe your body language. What does your impatient self look like? On the right side of your mind’s eye, see yourself when you are very patient. What do you look like when you have a lifetime of time? As tense as you appeared on the left as your impatient self, see yourself as relaxed in your patience on the right. Now on the left side, see yourself as you appear when you’re depressed. Look carefully. How does that make you feel? Can you be aware of the aura of doom and gloom you’re radiating? And then, on the right side of your mind’s eye, see yourself as you are when you’re joyous. Merge with that happiness. Know how others would see you.

Continue seeing all the seemingly negative feelings and behaviors on the inner left-hand side of your mind’s eye and the opposite on the right. On the left, see yourself as jealous and on the right as how you appear when you are truly glad for someone else’s success or happiness. On the left, see the bigoted you and on the right, the all-embracing. On the left the mean, on the right the sweet. See the stupid you and the brilliant. See the clumsy and the graceful. On the left, see the unsatisfied and on the right, the contented.


Go on and on, becoming familiar with the "you" on the left and the opposite "you" on the right. Then see the total "you" who would be there on the left if none of the characteristics of the right side were present.


Now see the "you" who would be the totality of yourself with the right side only if none of the behaviors and feelings of the left side "you" had ever appeared.


The Dalai Lama tells us that there is nothing else necessary because just by seeing your negative left-side self, you will become so disgusted with yourself when you witness yourself acting in any of the left side ways that you will automatically cease any of those actions and start doing and feeling the right-side actions. Eventually, you will become the right-side you exclusively. Eventually, you will have peace, compassion, wisdom, good health, patience,
and all the other glorious aspects of life.


This technique has the potential to change your life profoundly for the better. It is one of the best antidotes for negativity. It is consistent with his unlimited compassion that the Dalai Lama has shared it with us.

LIVE CONSCIOUSLY!

COMPASSION


Reawakening Your Compassionate Self

"To love is the greatest thing in life; and it is very important to talk about love, to feel it, to nourish it, to treasure it, otherwise it is soon dissipated... But the moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delight, the ecstasy of it, you will discover that for you the world is transformed." - Krishnamurti

Life is filled with indefinite emotional challenges, and for many of us these challenges force us to protect ourselves and to "be strong" in order to survive. Yet this so-called strength often comes by way of ignoring the pain and suffering of others. This denial of our vulnerability and the refusal to acknowledge the suffering of those around us is the denial of our most innate, humane and spiritual emotion: compassion.

Dalai Lama once said, "genuine compassion is based on the rationale that all human beings have an innate desire to be happy and overcome suffering... [And] on the basis of this recognition of this equality and commonality, you develop a sense of affinity and closeness with others." Clearly it is our own ability to experience grief that ultimately allows us to understand the pain of others.

But while it is important that we acknowledge our personal emotional struggles and the struggles of others, we do not necessarily need to attract challenges in order to be truly compassionate.

All of us have access to the compassionate light within each of our souls and from time to time it is necessary to reconnect with that lost light.





The following technique and aromatic blend has been designed to allow you to fully express, deeply appreciate and unconditionally love not only yourself, but others as well

~ Technique to Reawaken Your Compassionate Self ~

In order to reawaken your compassionate self, it is important that you become aware of your feelings. Take an occasional moment out of your busy schedule to reflect on your emotions. Find a quiet, peaceful place where you can center yourself and take some time alone. Sit comfortably, breathe deeply and allow all emotions to come up to the surface.

Acknowledge your feelings and honestly reflect on them. Love yourself, your whole personality, and forgive your mistakes--as mistakes are simply lessons. Think not from your head but also from your heart, feel and be fully present.

Blend to Reawaken Compassion

Prepare the following mixture in a 10ml bottle. Pour the essential oils in first, and then fill with vegetable oil (sweet almond, jojoba, etc.).

* 4 drops Rose Otto
* 12 drops Sandalwood
* 6 drops Cypress

Anoint the heart chakra and third eye. Pour a few drops into the palms of your hands and inhale deeply. Pour a few drops into your warm bath water and soak for at least 15 minutes.

--------------------------------------------------------------

"If there is love, there is hope that one may have real families, real brotherhood, real equanimity, and real peace. If the love within your mind is lost and you see other beings as enemies, then no matter how much knowledge or education or material comfort you have, only suffering and confusion will ensue"
His Holiness the Dalai Lama

CELEBRATE YOUR JOURNEY


My Girlfriend passed this article along to me... had to share.

READ THIS VERY SLOWLY... IT'S PRETTY PROFOUND.

Too many people put off something that brings them joy just because they haven't thought about it, don't have it on their schedule, didn't know it was coming or are too rigid to depart from their routine.

I got to thinking one day about all those women on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night in an effort to cut back From then on, I've tried to be a little more flexible.

How many women out there will eat at home because their husband didn't suggest going out to dinner until after something had been thawed? Does the word "refrigeration" mean nothing to you?

How often have your kids dropped in to talk and sat in silence while you watched 'Jeopardy' on television?

I cannot count the times I called my sister and said, "How about going to lunch in a half hour?" She would gas up and stammer, "I can't. I have clothes on the line. My hair is dirty. I wish I had known yesterday, I had a late breakfast, It looks like rain." And my personal favorite: "It's Monday." .She died a few years ago. We never did have lunch together.

Because Americans cram so much into their lives, we tend to schedule our headaches. We live on a sparse diet of promises we make to ourselves when all the conditions are perfect!

We'll go back and visit the grandparents when we get Steve toilet-trained. We'll entertain when we replace the living-room carpet. We'll go on a second honeymoon when we get two more kids out of college.

Life has a way of accelerating as we get older. The days get shorter, and the list of promises to ourselves gets longer. One morning, we awaken, and all we have to show for our lives is a litany of "I'm going to," "I plan on," and "Someday, when things are settled down a bit."

When anyone calls my 'seize the moment' friend, she is open to adventure and available for trips. She keeps an open mind on new ideas. Her enthusiasm for life is contagious. You talk with her for five minutes, and you're ready to trade your bad feet for a pair of Roller blades and skip an elevator for a bungee cord.

My lips have not touched ice cream in 10 years. I love ice cream. It's just that I might as well apply it directly to my stomach with a spatula and eliminate the digestive process. The other day, I stopped the car and bought a triple-decker. If my car had hit an iceberg on the way home, I would have died happy.

Now...go on and have a nice day. Do something you WANT to......not something on your SHOULD DO list. If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting?

Make sure you read this to the end; you will understand why I sent this to you.

Have you ever watched kids playing on a merry go round or listened to the rain lapping on the ground? Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight or gazed at the sun into the fading night? Do you run through each day on the fly? When you ask "How are you?" Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done, do you lie in your bed with the next hundred chores running through your head? Ever told your child, "We'll do it tomorrow." And in your haste, not see his sorrow? Ever lost touch? Let a good friendship die? Just call to say "Hi"?

When you worry and hurry through your day, it is like an unopened gift....Thrown away.... Life is not a race. Take it slower. Hear the music before the song is over.

"Life may not be the party we hoped for... but while we are here we might as well dance!"

ALWAYS MAKE TIME TO PAMPER YOURSELF!

Wonderful Foaming Honey Foot Bath at Home
I imagine you can tell me at length about how tired your feet and legs get after your busy day. When is the last time you got to treat yourself to a day at the spa? Even if you had the time, it’s not too often you can afford the $100 cost of a simple, relaxing, foot soak.
Doesn’t that sound nice? Relaxing feet soak at a spa. So I put together this simple recipe so you can have that soothing soak with ingredients you probably already have at home, and can whip up immediately.

Step 1. Create this wonderful foaming honey foot bath at home.
Here’s what you need:

1 tablespoon Honey
1 tablespoon Liquid Soap (I used dish soap)
1 teaspoon Vanilla Extract
2 tablespoons Sweet Almond Oil
The almond oil was the only things that sounded like it was tough to find, but my wife and I found it at the chain drugstore at the corner of our street. Just take a look in the beauty/cosmetic aisle.
Mix all these ingredients together in a bowl and its ready for your foot bath. Note: If you want to make this stuff in a large quantity to save for later, you can bump up all the ingredients to something like this:
½ cup Honey
½ cup Liquid Soap (I used dish soap)
1 tablespoon Vanilla Extract
1 cup Sweet Almond Oil
Now you can save this in a bottle and save some time for next time.

Step 2. Find yourself a foot bath
These days you can get a fancy, space-age, foot bath for about $20. They promise they do all sorts of things like vibration, bubbles, and heat. I haven’t tried one myself, but for $20 that probably isn’t a bad experiment.

Step 3. Fill up your foot bath

Put your mixed up mixture from Step 1 into your foot bath and fill with warm water.
Please be real careful with the water temperature. Do this by triple checking the temperature of the water with your hands when it’s done. And if you are doing this for a spouse make sure you understand their taste in temperature.

Step 4. Soak for 10 minutes
The soap is obviously cleaning all sorts of impurities from your feet. I can’t even explain how many things the honey is doing. Here is a short list:
1) Apparently honey forms hydrogen peroxide which is a great anti bacterial agent. So there is goes cleansing your feet some more.
2) Honey contains antioxidants. Health news constantly revolves around us getting more antioxidants. So without me getting all biologists on us, I’ll just confirm that getting more antioxidants on our skin and in our diet is really super great!
3) Honey is also terrific humectants. That entire means is it makes a great moisturizer.
***
.


CELEBRATE YOUR GREATNESS

UNDERSTANDING OUR OWN
CONNECTION

It is our right and our obligation to
ourselves, and those in our world, to be
certain we are engaging in our life with
integrity, with accurate information and
with full awareness about ourselves



Through the process of coaching,
women deepen their level of learning,
improve performance, and enhance the
quality of lives through the coaching
process.


LITTLE CHOICES
MAKE BIG CHANGES
LIVE
INSPIRED



WWW.GIRLTIMCOACHING.NET


"Maxim for life: You get treated in life the way you teach people to treat you.”
- Wayne Dyer quote


Values are so important because they fundamentally shape our relationships, our behaviors, our choices, and who we are. So, without knowing what our values are, it is actually impossible to create the lives we want because there is no foundation to build them on. Many can't understand why they do not reach certain goals as they dream. Likewise, some reach goals yet still feel empty and unfilled. Why is that? I believe it is because they have made goals based on outer appearances, what others what from them or what they think they want or should want for themselves.The goals in essence do not match with what the heart desires.

So much emphasis is placed on making goals and reaching them, but not too much is said about values. I suggest that if one's values are not determined and in place, making goals and achieving them will prove worthless. Goals that are achieved without a core foundation will leave you feeling empty every time because the goals and achievements are not in alignment with whom you really are.

It stands to reason then that if you determine your values first to help clarify and confirm what it is that is truly important in life. Then question of values if often overlooked, too, it seems such a huge and impossible question to answer. The word "value" is so easily and loosely used, but when I ask a client, "So what are your values?" they come up tongue-tied almost every time. In fact they do no fully understand what a value is. Values and goals often get mixed up too. It is true! Where does one start?

COACHING QUESTION OF THE DAY
What do your values need to be for you to create the lifestyle of your choice?

www.girltimecoaching.net